Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
