if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Randomize
