I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
