it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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