Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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