i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
