Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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