fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
