Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
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