she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
