Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
