That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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