Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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