The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
