Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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