He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
