Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
