I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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