Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
