C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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