While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
