I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
