i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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