There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
