And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I'm at about main and main street
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
