i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
