So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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