what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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