he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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