we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
