I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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