You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
