The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Randomize
