so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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