Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize