i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
high people should be assigned attendants
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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