At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
