My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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