Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
