Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
