Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
