Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(318): View more from Louisiana

i was rollin on her like bob the builder

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(972): View more from Texas

Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE

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(585): View more from New York

If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.

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(807): View more from Ontario

Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway

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(941): View more from Florida

My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.

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