I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
