Soap is not a condiment
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
