Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Randomize
