I'm eating all of the evidence.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I've blown a few things in my day
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
