btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
