Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(540): View more from Virginia

My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends

(704): View more from North Carolina

Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.

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(206): View more from Washington

My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed

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(586): View more from Michigan

Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.

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(705): View more from Ontario

I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him

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(651): View more from Minnesota

It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat

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