ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize