Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
